Photo: Steve Bender
Yes, it’s Mother’s Day, that special period of 24 hours when all the people of the world stop to consider just how much their mothers mean to them. Judy and I have gone all out for Mother’s Day this year. We’re spending it at the beach!
Neither of our mothers are here at the beach with us, so you may ask, “Just how does selfish idyll of yours that we wish we were part of honor them?” Well, it all goes back to an exchange between Judy and me many Mother’s Days ago.
Judy: Did you send your mother a Mother’s Day card?
Grumpy: Of course.
Judy: You didn’t send ME a Mother’s Day card.
Grumpy: That’s because you’re not my mother.
Judy: I AM, however, the mother of your son.
Grumpy: Did Brian get you a Mother’s Day card?
Judy: No.
Grumpy: What a self-centered, little jerk!
Judy: Like his father.
Grumpy: Huh?
What I eventually caught on to was that the mother of your children expects you to recognize her on Mother’s Day in addition to your Mom. Who knew? So Happy Mother’s Day, Judy! Thanks so much for paying for our beach house. When’s dinner?
As for my mother, Happy Mother’s Day, Mom! From the looks of things, it’s off to a good start.
Looking good for 93! Photo: Steve Bender
And Happy Mother’s Day to all mothers out there! I’ll send each one of you a card — as soon as I finish this frozen daiquiri. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.
Filed under: The Daily South, The Grumpy Gardener Tagged: Beach, Homepage, Humor, Mother's Day
